Daily life

It’s been rough

Hey everyone! Welcome back! Here is an update on me:

Mentally:

I have been up and down. This week I have been super stressed because finals in next week. Most of the day I have been really down and Thursday I had a breakdown. But I saw my therapist and felt better. I just most feel stressed because of finals and down because of my physical pain being so bad. I am hanging in there. It’s been rough.

Physically:

I have been in a lot of physical pain due to fibromyalgia. I am tiring to get in to see a pain doctor since my last doctor didn’t work out. So far the pain doctor hasn’t called me back. I have just been hurting all day every day. It’s been rough tough and I have been so tired due to how much pain I am in. I have been having to take naps due to being so sleepy. I found this cream that has been helping but only helps for an hour. I have been going to see my chiropractor three days a week and that helps for a few hours. I have been wearing my tens unit a lot.

It’s been really rough but I have been making it. I am mostly just ready for finals to be over with and for Christmas break! So next week I will be on Christmas break!❤️ yay!❤️

Thank you so much for reading! I hope you have an amazing day! I love you all❤️

-xoxo Caty❤️

Daily life

Trying to hold on

Hey everyone!❤️ welcome back! Before I update you on me, I want to share some positive things that are happening:

I finally found a good Chircopractor who is really helping me. I have had a wonderful thanksgiving. My college semester is almost over and I have A’s and B’s. So yay!❤️

Here’s the update on me:

Mentally:

I have been feeling really depressed. I know I feel depressed because I am in so much physical pain due to fibromyalgia. But it’s still really hard. Last night I cried and cried because I was so sad and in so much pain. But thankfully my family was there to listen and love me. I feel really depressed just because of my pain but pain is pain. It’s been really rough.

Physically:

My physical pain is unbearable. I felt sick to my stomach last night because I was hurting so bad. I am in constant chronic pain. It’s never ending and it’s unbearable. It’s been really rough and hard.

I have been facing a lot but I will keep going. People keep telling me to be positive and happy but I don’t know how because I am in so much pain. I know there are good things in my life but all I feel is pain.

But I will hold on. I will keep going❤️

I am sorry if this update was depressing but it’s just how I have been truly feeling.

Thank you for listening! I love you all!❤️💖💙💜🧡 I will see you again next week!❤️

-xoxo Caty❤️💖💜🧡💙

Daily life

Not doing good at all

Hey everyone❤️ welcome back! Here’s an update from me:

Mentally:

Honestly I am very depressed. I know I am probably depressed due to being in so much unbearable pain from fibromyalgia. But depression is depression and it’s sucks. I still keep going: go to school, do my homework, shower, do chores, use my coping a skills, but I still feel depressed. I’m not okay. I’m not alright. But I am making it. I am not giving up (even though I think about giving up a lot). I just keep going❤️

Physically:

My pain from fibromyalgia is unbearable. I am in constant chronic pain every minute of every day. I hurt so bad and it’s makes me so depressed. I feel sad, depressed, and I cry a lot. I am going to see a pain management clinic soon so hopefully that will help. I am seeing a new Chircopractor on Monday. So hopefully, something will help. Ugh. I just feel horrible. But I am making it. I am just taking it one day at a time💜

I do have some good news: my some of my poems are going to be published in a book by a poetry publishing company! Yay!❤️

So I am really not okay.

I’m really not alright.

But I am making it.

I am hanging in there.

Just taking each day, one minute at a time💖

***

Thank you so much for reading! I love you all. See you next week!❤️💜💖

-xoxo Caty❤️💜💖

Daily life

I’m not okay

Hey everyone! Welcome back! Here’s an update on me:

Mentally:

I am really struggling. I am feeling down and depressed a lot. Probably because I am working hard in therapy on overcoming the abuse I went through. It’s been really hard. Now in therapy I am talking about the lies I have believe about myself. Honestly I am not doing good mentally. I still going to school everyday and doing my homework. But I still feel very down and depressed a lot. I know I probably feel depressed because my physical pain from fibromyalgia has been really bad. So I am not okay.

Physically:

I am in a lot of pain everyday. I finally got my new tens unit which has been helping. My doctor increased my pain medicine that has helped but I am still in a lot of pain. I still believe that I have fibromyalgia because five doctors have told me I do. No matter what illness I have I am still in constant chronic pain everyday.

I am really not okay. I know it’s okay not to be okay❤️

I am sorry if this upload was depressing but honestly it how I feel❤️

Just keep me in your thoughts and prayers❤️

I love you all and will update again next week❤️

-xoxo Caty❤️

Daily life

Amazing news❤️💜💖

Hey everyone! I hope you are doing well! I have some very good news to share with all of you:

I saw my doctor for my fibromyalgia last week and he increased my pain medicine. But my doctor believes I don’t have fibromyalgia. He believe my chronic pain is due to my sleep apnea. He told me of a mouth guard I can get that will help. He believes that with my mouth guard and using my sleep apnea machine, I can get better! He said it will take a few months but I can get better and maybe even be pain free!!!😊😊💛💛❤️❤️

I am very excited about that news! I can get better!😊❤️💜💖

Here’s an update on me:

Mentally:

I have been doing okay. In therapy I am working hard on overcoming the abuse I went through. So I have been struggling with overcoming my past. But for the most part, I am really good. My mood has gotten a lot better😊❤️💜💖 I feel happy!❤️💛💖💜

Physically:

I am still in a lot of pain. My tens unit broke and I use it a lot. So that’s been hard because my pain is better with my tens unit. I get a new tens unit on Tuesday so that is good. I have been resting on the heating pad a lot because I have been in a lot of pain. But I am making it. I am hanging in there❤️

Overall I am doing very well and very excited about what the future holds! I am doing really good in college and have made some friends. In the fall I might be doing an internship with my favorite teacher. It’s an internship for English majors (I am an English major). So hopefully I will get the internship!❤️💛💜💖

I am doing really good❤️😊💜💖

***

Want to get encouraging emails every week? Then sign up for my email list! I will send out very positive and uplifting emails every week! Just comment below your email or use the link below⬇️❤️⬇️

http://eepurl.com/grsI6z

***

Thank you so much for reading! I love you all! I will see you all again next week!❤️

-xoxo Caty❤️❤️

Daily life

Focusing on good❤️

Hey everyone! I hope you are doing well. Here’s an update on me:

Mentally:

This week was tough because in therapy I have been finally talking about the abuse I went through. So this week has been really hard I haven’t been coping very well. I have been really sad and down. But this weekend has been amazing!❤️ I told myself that I am tired of focusing on my pain and problems so this weekend has been amazing because I have been focusing on all my blessings💛 it has really worked I am doing really good🧡

Physically:

This week has been really rough on my fibromyalgia. I have been in a lot of pain this week. But yesterday was a much better day and I really enjoyed. I got a lot of laundry done so that was really good. My pain is better today❤️💜💖💛💙

Focusing on the good things in my life has really been so helpful. I realized how happy I am if I focus on the good and not my problems and pain❤️💜💖🧡💛

I am doing great and I am going to enjoy it❤️

****

If you haven’t heard, I do a chronic illness and mental illness podcast all about bring hope to those how struggle with mental illnesses and/or chronic illnesses. I update that podcast two times a week and it would mean the world to me if you check it out!❤️

Links are below⬇️⬇️⬇️

Chronically Caty on Apple Podcast:

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/chronically-caty/id1459565351?uo=4

Chronically Caty Spotify:

https://open.spotify.com/show/4aJlFcCxLNxQuXpnQD9gcQ

Chronically Caty on Google Podcast:

https://www.google.com/podcasts?feed=aHR0cHM6Ly9hbmNob3IuZm0vcy9hNjcyN2Y4L3BvZGNhc3QvcnNz

***

Thank you so much for reading! I will see you guys again next week! I love you all❤️

-xoxo Caty❤️

Daily life

I’m not okay

Hey everyone❤️ happy Sunday! I hope you are doing well. Here’s an update on me:

Mentally:

I am not doing so good mentally. I started therapy Thursday and I wrote a lot about my anger about having fibromyalgia. I have been feeling lots of feelings about how I feel towards my diagnosis of fibro. I have just been feeling really depressed and down. But I have been writing a lot about my feelings so that is good. This week I have just felt really down so it’s been hard. But today I feel a little bit better so I am going to enjoy feeling better today❤️ I know I am still depressed but I am making it. It’s been really rough and but I am hanging in there💜

Physically:

I have been in SOO much pain from fibromyalgia. It’s been exhausting and frustrating how much pain I have been in. I have been wearing my tens unit pretty much all day everyday. My pain has been very bad and when my pain is bad it makes me feel much more depressed. It’s been bad but I am making it. Everyday I get up and do things despite feeling depressed and in pain❤️

I wrote a poem about how I have been feeling:

How am I supposed to be okay

How am I supposed to be okay,

With tears running down my face.

How am I supposed to be okay,

When my back feels like it’s on fire.

How am I supposed to be okay,

With the fact that I am in constant chronic pain,

From fibromyalgia.

How am I supposed to,

Praise God,

And be thankful,

That I am still in unbearable pain.

How am I supposed to be okay,

When I can’t sleep at night.

How am I supposed to be okay,

When I have to talk about the abuse I went through.

How my ex boyfriend:

Beat me,

Slapped me,

Screamed at me,

And touched me.

How am I supposed to be okay with that?

How am I supposed to make peace with the abuse.

How am I supposed to be okay,

 When his new girlfriend goes to my school,

And is in my writing group.

How is that okay?

How am I supposed to be okay,

When I still feel depressed.

How am I supposed to be okay with,

 The fact that I will never be pain free,

From fibromyalgia.

How I am supposed to be okay,

That mental illnesses,

And chronic pain,

Destroyed my life.

How is it okay for a young girl to have:

Bipolar,

Anxiety,

Social anxiety,

Depression, 

And fibromyalgia.

How can I praise God,

When all I can think about is what He took from me.

He took my mental state,

At the young age of thirteen.

He took my health by being diagnosed with fibromyalgia,

At nineteen.

Now I am twenty-one,

And still not fucking okay.

I’m not okay.

I don’t know if I ever will be.

So tell me God:

How am I supposed to be okay,

With everything!?!?

How am I supposed to be okay.

**

I am not okay right now. But I am just going to keep going, no matter what❤️

You keep going to babe❤️

Thank you for reading!❤️ I love you all❤️

-xoxo Caty❤️